A situationship is a non-formal romantic or sexual relationship, in which no formal labels or commitments of a conventional relationship are involved. It is the gray area where you are not quite committed partners, but you are more than friends. You may be experiencing a situationship in case you have ever been in a romantic relationship that seems to be languishing in neutral and does not know whether it is progressing or merely doing the same thing again.
This article will help you to be aware of the signs, deal with the emotional depths and choose whether these types of relationships work well with you or not.
What is a Situationship?
A situationship is simply a relationship that has not been defined. It is typified by a sense of vagueness in which the two individuals engaged in it, generally have not seriously talked about what the relationship is and where it is going. With a situationship, you may be dating, spending much time together and may even be physically intimate, yet it is not entitled to any formal designation such as boyfriend or girlfriend.
Just consider it the middle-ground stage–all the benefits of having a romantic partner without any of the restrictions of a complete commitment. Although at times this might be quite convenient, the ambiguity usually results in misunderstanding and emotional strain.
Key Signs of a Situationship
When you are in a situationship, you are not always aware of it. Things may seem exciting and carefree at first, but with time you may observe trends that indicate that the relationship lacks clarity and commitment. Here are some common signs:
Lack of Labels
The conversation about the DTR (Define the Relationship) is avoided or awkward. You cannot tell whether you are seeing each other, hanging out or just doing something completely different.
Emotional Ambiguity
There are many times when you are not sure what the other person is thinking. Talks on feelings are indeterminate or do not take place at all and you are left wondering whether it is into you or it is a fling.
Inconsistent Communication
Your communication is erratic, and it has been using a lot of texting. One day the messages come rolling through your phone and the next day, there is no radio traffic. With this rollercoaster you wonder where you are.
No Future Plans
It is not common to plan ahead such as a vacation next month or even family get together meetings. Your communication and relationships are usually designed to only be in the current moment.
Physical Intimacy without Deep Emotions
There might be plenty of physical affection, but lack of deeper emotional attachment. You might enjoy wonderful time together, you spend time together fondly, but do not have many thoughtful talks about heart and dreams or intimate issues.
Exclusivity without Commitment
You may not be dating anyone, but it is not the case that this exclusive grants you a relationship. The presumption that one is the only one does not become a promise to each other of a shared future.
The Emotional Rollercoaster of a Situationship
A situationship may be a kind of emotional tug-of-war. You feel excited about the connection and the potential that you can see one day and then the next, you are full of doubt and anxiety about the lack of clarity. Such inconsistency can cost you greatly in terms of emotional wellbeing.
This instability can lead to persistent insecurities about the frequency of dating, the true nature of your partner, and whether or not they’re genuine. This confusion is what often causes the most pain.
Different Types of Situationships
Not every situationship is the same. Such relationships may be of various forms depending on the involved people, the circumstances, and the intensity of emotional investment. The following are some of the usual situationships:
The Almost-Relationship
This category is very close to being a committed relationship, yet something prevents it from taking that step. Both individuals are free to date, to spend time together, to behave as a couple- but commitment is not specified.
The Casual Fling
The basis of a casual fling is more physical attraction and convenience. It might be minimal or nonexistent emotional attachment and both individuals tend not to have more in-depth discussions about the future.
The On-and-Off Dynamic
And it is not a steady situationship, it is full of ups and downs. Today it seems to be a relationship, the next day there is space. The instability of it allows one to not know where things are.
The Friends-With-Benefits Situationship
This type of friendship is contrasted to traditional friendships in that intimacy, but no commitment is involved. Although it might begin with the obvious commencing point, emotions can be complicated when one of the partners insists on more than the other.
The Transitional Situationship
A situationship may sometimes be the case due to one or both individuals being in transition of life such as following a breakup, prior to a move or a time of self-discovery. It is not very long lasting and fills an emotional or physical void.
The Long-Term Situationship
In other instances, individuals remain in an undefined relationship over months or even years. Both can evade labelling it because they are afraid of commitment, they have goals that are in conflict, or they are content with the existing dynamic.
Also Read – Situationship vs. Relationship: What’s the Difference?
What to Do If You’re in a Situationship
Once you have determined that you are in a situationship, the next thing is to figure out what to do. The decision made should be according to your own emotional needs and relationship goals.
Reflect on Your Needs
Be very cruel to yourself. Do you really feel comfortable with ambiguity or are you secretly longing to have a more serious and committed relationship? The first step to making a decision that would serve you is to understand what you need.
Communicate Openly
When you are not satisfied, then it is time to have a good talk. It may be overwhelming, but the only way of gaining clarity is to tell them how you feel and how you think the other person is taking the situation.
Set Clear Boundaries
Although you may still want to keep the situationship, you need boundaries to be in place so that you can be emotionally healthy. Talk about things such as exclusivity and how much emotional support you want to avoid confusion and offended feelings.
Consider Taking a Break
In some cases, you may need to take a back seat to the situation to have a viewpoint. This is the time when you need to reflect on yourself and decide whether the relationship is worthwhile continuing or whether it is holding you back to explore something that can be more rewarding.
Move On
When the situationship is rather confusing and hurting you than happy, it is time to leave. It is not easy to end things, but it is better to be free to search for a relationship which meets your goals rather than being in a state of uncertainty.
Try to Define the Relationship
If you have a strong desire to develop a deeper connection with someone, you can ask them if they’re ready for a more serious relationship. Now, be prepared to listen, and remember: you can never change someone who doesn’t want to change.
Conclusion
A situationship may be confusing, thrilling or even frustrating, depending on what you seek in a relationship. With a clear understanding of its meaning, the signs, and even the various types, you can be able to have a clear picture of where you are with someone. Whereas other individuals can afford to be flexible and unlabeled, others might not be satisfied with the absence of commitment.
Honesty, to oneself and to the other person, is the key to a situationship, in fact. A situationship could be effective in case your requirements and expectations are similar. However, when you realize that you need more stability and understanding, you can be ready to express yourself or leave and find a partner who will serve your interests.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is a situationship the same as friends with benefits?
They are alike in the fact that they are both usually uncommitted physical intimacy. Nevertheless, a situationship may occasionally have a more romantic and dating quality, falling somewhere in a wider gray zone between friendship and a serious relationship.
Can a situationship ever become a real relationship?
Yes, it can be when the two individuals fall in love and make a joint decision to get into a specific relationship. This needs an open dialogue where both are willing to proceed with labels and expectations.
How long do situationships typically last?
Situationship is very loose in terms of length. Some of them are temporary, and some may last months and even years. The thing is that, in the absence of direction, long-term situationship may become a source of feeling that time went down the drain and emotions were drained.
Are situationships healthy?
Situationships may prove effective among individuals, and they can be those who are not yet committed and find freedom. Nevertheless, they may be unhealthy when one individual desire more and is nervous, insecure, or feels emotionally exhausted because of the absence of clarity and promise. The best indicator of whether the situation is healthy to you or not is your emotional wellbeing.
